


always your biggest fan

by rosllyn (orphan_account)



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Small Town, Aspiring Singer-Songwriter Jisung, Best Friends, Dreams & Hopes, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M, Midnight Drive, Mutual Pining, Personal Growth, Rain, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:22:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26798761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/rosllyn
Summary: Jisung is moving to the other side of the country to chase his dreams, and it forces Hyunjin to finally properly realize his feelings for the younger and weigh what it is that's truly important in life.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 95





	always your biggest fan

“Ah, I can’t believe this is it!” Jisung exclaims, letting out a small laugh. He has a smile on his face, but the look in his eyes is a bit wistful and reminiscent, “The last time we worked together here”, he continues and shakes his head a little, like not even believing it. 

“Tell me about it”, Hyunjin says and lets out a silent breath. He doesn’t want to let the suffocating longing take over his heart and body yet, not now when Jisung is still here. He has all the time in the world to be sad later. He pushes those thoughts out of his mind and smiles brightly instead, “We’ve really had the best time working together, haven’t we?”

They have been working in the movie theater Hyunjin’s family owns for a few years now. First, just occasional sifts while still studying in high school, and then full-time after graduating. For Hyunjin, it’s always been expected that he continues the family business. Jisung, on the other hand, has always known he wants to do music for living, and he’s been diligently working towards that dream on his free time. 

And the younger’s dream is finally coming true. He’s been accepted by a proper, big record label that will provide him with everything he needs to become a real singer-songwriter and a producer. The record label operates on the other side of the country. So Jisung will be moving away in a few days. 

“We really have”, Jisung admits and grins widely. They both swear they’ve had a lot more fun working together behind the counter, than they ever could coming to the movie theater as customers. Their workdays have been filled with endless laughter, trying to act cool and professional while serving the customers, eating way too much popcorn and drinking even more soda, and even enjoying cleaning the premises, because anything can be fun when you do it with your best friend. 

Jisung is Hyunjin’s absolute best friend in the whole world. And a lot more honestly, but Hyunjin’s never been brave enough to go there and confess his feelings. He probably would have, eventually, if it weren’t for Jisung moving away now.

It breaks Hyunjin’s heart that Jisung is leaving and he won’t be seeing the younger every day anymore, but he’s also the happiest he’s even been. All he’s ever wanted for Jisung, is for the younger to be happy and reach his dreams. Hyunjin’s always been Jisung’s biggest fan.

The front door of the movie theater opens inwards. Jisung pulls it and then holds it open for Hyunjin, bowing theatrically in the process, “After you, your prettiness”, he says with a smile in his voice.

“Stop flirting with me, Han Jisung”, Hyunjin says, absolutely not meaning it, and steps out of the movie theater.

“Never”, Jisung grins and follows the older. They set off walking home. This time they didn’t need to lock the place up since the last movie of the evening is still to run and Hyunjin’s mother will be working for the last hours. She’s training the new employee who’s going to replace Jisung.

It’s still rather warm outside, even if the autumn has replaced the summer already a while ago. The black streets are covered with fallen leaves painted with the colors of red, orange, yellow and brown. Strong wind pushes past them, flying the hair on their heads to the air. It’s already dark outside, their walk is illuminated by the dim light of the streetlamps. 

Jisung reaches to take Hyunjin’s hand in his, intertwining their fingers and swaying their arms back and forth. Hyunjin doesn’t even remember when they started doing this, holding hands while walking, it’s just been a habit of theirs for a long time. Does it mean something? Probably not. Jisung’s just always been the type to like physical contact.

Though, sometimes Hyunjin can’t help but to feel that Jisung does feel the same way about him as he does about Jisung. As more than a friend. But the older is always pretty quick to shoot himself down, because he doesn’t want to get his hopes up in case he turns out wrong. This kind of thing is hard to approach, Hyunjin thinks, since they are best friends and that is something he would never want to ruin. And if Jisung happened to like him like that too, Hyunjin knows the younger would think the same way. 

It doesn’t take long for them to reach Jisung’s house. Unlike Hyunjin, Jisung hasn’t moved out to live on his own, because he’s known that sooner than later, he’ll be moving to another city. So he hasn’t in the meantime bothered to find an apartment and relocate in this small town. 

“Have you already packed everything?” Hyunjin asks when they stop in front of the gate.

“Well, not everything, but pretty much”, Jisung shrugs.

“Do you need help with the rest?” 

“No. But also yes. I can manage the packing but you should definitely come for moral support”, Jisung says and gives the older an innocent smile. 

“Obviously”, Hyunjin grins and they head inside. Jisung’s house is like a second home for Hyunjin, he can come and go however he likes. Jisung’s parents don’t mind even if he comes over as late as this, and leaves somewhere in the middle of the night or just ends up saying the night. 

In the end, no one does any packing at all. They just hang around and Hyunjin gets to listen to the new music Jisung’s been working on.

He has no doubts that the younger will become something big.

  
~~~~~

  
The few days left just fly by, and soon Hyunjin finds himself on the evening before the day of Jisung’s departure. The younger has understandably been spending the day with his family, and even though he had asked for Hyunjin to come too, this time Hyunjin hadn’t wanted to join them. Jisung should spend some time with just his family. 

Hyunjin lays on his bed and stares at the ceiling in the almost dark room, reflecting about his life and the decisions he has made over the years. Sometimes he wishes he had more options in life and wasn’t so tied up to the family business thing. He loves the movie theater and the work there, but it ties him to this tiny city with its tiny circles so tightly that it sometimes feels suffocating. He fears letting his parents down, and that’s why he doesn’t dare to say it out loud that he secretly hopes to just pack his bags and follow Jisung out to the big world. 

Hyunjin’s train of thoughts is stopped when his phone suddenly starts to ring. He startles a little and then grabs his phone that’s been lying on the mattress next to him. It’s Jisung calling.

“Hey”, Hyunjin answers the phone. 

“ _Hey, pumpkin_ ”, Jisung’s cheery voice floats through the speaker. Hyunjin rolls his eyes at the pet name but can’t help it when a wide smile creeps on his lips.

“ _I’m outside your building_ ”, Jisung then says. 

Hyunjin should have known the younger wouldn’t just let his last full day here go without seeing Hyunjin. The older jumps out of his bed.

“I’ll be down in a sec”, he says and then shuts the call. He slides the phone in the pocket of his sweatpants and then throws a hoodie over the ancient old t-shirt he’s wearing. Then he moves to put on shoes and exits the apartment. Hyunjin doesn’t bother waiting for the elevator, instead he just jogs down the few staircases. 

Jisung’s standing on the edge of the sidewalk, right in front of the apartment building. He’s leaning against the car he and his parents take turns using. Hyunjin walks up to him.

“I thought we could do one last midnight drive”, Jisung proposes, nudging his head towards the car behind him. Hyunjin doesn’t like the sound of ‘one last’ but he does want to go for a ride with Jisung. It’s something they’ve done occasionally ever since Jisung got his driver’s license. 

“Sure”, Hyunjin smiles, and Jisung moves from the way so that the older can open the door to the shotgun. Jisung slides to the driver’s seat and gives Hyunjin a wide grin. Then he presses the gas and they fly down the empty street.

It’s always a blast going for nightly drives outside the town borders. The small town where they live is located in the middle of nowhere, and it’s surrounded by circuitous roads and endless amount of no man’s land. Jisung and Hyunjin can keep their windows down, listen to music on a loud volume and drive slightly too fast, all without having to worry that someone might meet them on the road.

They drive around for a while. Just enjoying the slightly cold wind messing their hairs, the music blasting from the speakers and each other’s momentarily quiet company. The roads they’re driving along are void of any streetlamps, so Jisung has the high beams on, illuminating the darkness ahead of them. Eventually, Jisung turns from the main street and drives the car up on a hill, where they know will be a nice lookout spot.

Jisung parks the car on top of the hill and Hyunjin exits the car. The younger follows a moment later. Hyunjin hops to sit on the hood of the car and so does Jisung. Jisung’s parents probably wouldn’t appreciate it if they knew, but what they don’t know, won’t hurt them. The younger hands Hyunjin a can of soda.

“Thanks”, Hyunjin smiles and pops the can open, taking a swig of the sugary drink. He looks at the dark view ahead of them, just wasteland and some trees all the way to the horizon. They could be watching the stars, if it weren’t for the dark clouds covering the sky. It will probably start raining sooner or later.

There’s not much to see, but luckily both of them are here for the company, not for the view. They’re quiet for a moment, before Jisung eventually breaks the silence.

“I’m actually leaving tomorrow”, he breathes out, like he had just only now really realized it.

“I know”, Hyunjin says quietly, staring at the soda can in his hand. Right now, he can’t turn his eyes to look at Jisung. He might start crying.

“I’m pretty terrified, to be honest”, Jisung then admits. Now Hyunjin can’t but to look at the younger, raising his eyebrows at him. 

“Don’t get me wrong, I'm super excited, this is something I've always wanted. But... Just... What if I just make a fool of myself? What if I release music and nobody likes it? If they just leave nasty comments and I become a public laughing stock? If I just get kicked out of the rec-”

“Jisung”, Hyunjin cuts the younger’s distressed ramble. He takes Jisung’s hand in his and gives it a comforting squeeze, “That is never going to happen”

“You don’t know that. You’re just biased because I'm your best friend”

“I’m biased because you make amazing music”, Hyunjin says, and gives the younger a stern look. He means every word he’s saying. Jisung can’t help it when a small smile raises to his lips.

“And besides”, Hyunjin continues, “If you were to fail, -and this is completely hypothetical because it’s never going to happen-, then who cares?” he says and gives Jisung a bright, encouraging smile, “At least you tried. Trust me, you will regret trying and failing much less, than you will regret never even trying at all”

Jisung looks at him, pondering over the words the older just said.

“I once came across this one thought somewhere”, Hyunjin then says, turning his eyes to look at the dark view before them again, “’ _The universe doesn’t care about you_ ’. I think it’s something you should always remember. The universe doesn’t care about you, it doesn’t wait for you to fail and it doesn’t care if you do. And I mean this the best way possible”

“You and I, we are just the tiniest specks in the grand scale of the universe. Our success of failure is such an insignificant thing on that scale. So it only needs to matter to you, and you have nothing to lose. If you fail, that’s fine. Then you’ll just try again or come up with something else. You should just go for the things that make you happy”

Jisung turns his eyes away from Hyunjin, letting the older’s words sink in. Then, eventually he turns his gaze back and smiles widely,

“Since when did you become so smart?” he asks jokingly.

“Hey!” Hyunjin exclaims laughing, and lightly smacks the younger with his hand.

“I’m just joking”, Jisung smiles and then his expression turns to more serious, “But seriously, thank you. You’re amazing”, he then whispers and leans to give the older a hug. 

Hyunjin hugs Jisung tightly, burying his face to the crook of the younger’s neck and breathing in the familiar, sweet scent. He feels the tears threatening to spill again, he doesn’t want to say goodbye to Jisung. It’s so easy to say all these things to the younger, encouraging him to make choices that will make him the happiest possible. But it’s not so easy for Hyunjin to apply those same thoughts to himself, allowing himself to make changes that would leave him a bit happier.

Their hug is interrupted by raindrops that suddenly start falling from the sky. The droplets feel a little cold against the skin.

“I guess that’s our cue to start heading back”, Jisung says, smiling a little, but disappointment weighs in his voice.

“Yeah”, Hyunjin says quietly and hops off the hood. They get inside the car, and Jisung backs up enough so that he can turn the car around and start driving back. 

The few first water droplets soon turn into a proper pouring rain. The wipers whip back and forth against the windscreen, allowing Jisung to still see ahead while driving. The younger doesn’t seem to mind the rain too much, but he has lowered the music down and drives a lot slower. Hyunjin likes the sound of raindrops hitting the roof of the car.

“Aw, shit”, Jisung says suddenly, “We’re running low on gas”

“Isn’t there the one cold station somewhere near here”, Hyunjin muses, watching through the window, somehow managing to recognize where they are driving.

“Oh yeah, you’re right”, Jisung realizes and soon makes a turn from the main road, and finds the cold station from next to the side road. At this point, the wind and the rain have gotten stronger, and the rain is pouring almost in diagonal direction.

Jisung parks the car next to the gasoline pump, but doesn’t get out of the car to fill the tank. Instead, he just turns to Hyunjin and gives the older an expectant look.

“What?” Hyunjin asks, puzzled.

“Well, I’m not going the be the only one going out into that rain”, Jisung answers like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Hyunjin blinks couple of times, “You want me to come and fill the tank with you so that we will both be wet?”

“Exactly. Solidarity before anything else”, Jisung says and smiles innocently. Hyunjin rolls his eyes but isn’t able to stifle the laugh that escapes his lips.

“Fine”, the older says and opens the door. The rain immediately pushes inside the car, from any hole possible. Hyunjin quickly jumps out of the car and kicks the door closed. Jisung does the same on the other side. 

It feels like the rain is coming from every direction. It immediately wets through Hyunjin’s hoodie and sweatpants, reaching for the skin underneath. It won’t take long for his hair to also be completely wet, sticking against his scalp.

The fluorescent lights of the tiny station are strikingly bright. The lights and the rain hitting Hyunjin’s face make it hard not to involuntarily squint one's eyes. The tiny roofing above the gasoline pump does nothing to shelter them from the rain. Jisung’s bright laugh echoes under the loud pouring of the rain. Hyunjin can’t help but to join to the laughter.

“This is crazy!” Jisung shouts laughing as he’s trying to fill the tank while the huge raindrops are literally everywhere. 

Hyunjin has decided there’s no use trying to not get wet, and it’s much better to just enjoy the moment, “Maybe! But it’s also pretty fun!” he shouts back, now opening his arms and lifting his face towards the sky. He closes his eyes and lets the water fall on him. One last getting soaked in the pouring rain before winter comes again.

Jisung finishes paying for the gas and then takes a look at Hyunjin’s pose. He lets out a laugh,

“You’re so dramatic!” the younger says jokingly.

Hyunjin turns to him and smiles, “You’re one to talk. Come on, let’s run in the rain”, he then proposes.

So they do. It’s not like Jisung would say no. You’re never too old to be running under a pouring rain, there’s always that magical feeling surrounding you when you do. The raindrops glimmer under the fluorescent lights, making an enchanting view as the two boys enjoy the rain for a while.

They both get completely soaked. Hyunjin is almost out of breath from the running and laughing, and by the looks of it, so is Jisung. They stop to stand in front of the car, and Jisung looks at Hyunjin. He looks at Hyunjin like the older was his whole world.

“I’m going to miss you so much”, Jisung whispers and gives Hyunjin a sad smile.

Hyunjin feels like crying again,

“I’m going to miss you more”

It’s almost like Jisung wants to say something else, but in the last moment, decides against it. He just gives the older a quick hug and then they head back into the car.

The drive back is pretty quiet. Not in a bad way, but in a very comforting way. The quiet, peaceful lo-fi music pours from the radio and Hyunjin enjoys the warm feeling of familiarity that surrounds them in the car. The rain doesn’t show any signs of subsiding, it looks more like it will just intensify to a proper storm.

It’s too quick that they already arrive back to Hyunjin’s apartment building. Jisung parks the car, this time on the other side of the street since they are coming from the opposite direction. He turns off the engine and turns to Hyunjin.

It’s so quiet in the car now that music has been turned off. Only the sound of raindrops hitting the sheet metal buzzes in Hyunjin’s ears. One of them should probably say something, but instead they’re just looking at each other. Hyunjin looks at Jisung, at his familiar eyes and features, and the older finally realizes something.

He doesn’t just like Jisung.

He _loves_ the boy.

Hyunjin’s eyes involuntarily flicker to look at Jisung’s lips. When he catches himself on the act, he quickly draws his eyes back to Jisung’s eyes. Only to see Jisung looking at his lips. 

When the younger lifts his eyes again, there’s a vulnerable look in them, exactly like the one Hyunjin knows he’s carrying in his own eyes right now. Is this real? Is this the confirmation Hyunjin’s been hoping to come across for so long, that Jisung does like him back after all?

Maybe they shouldn’t be doing this now, not when everything is about to drastically change for them. Or maybe they absolutely should. Hyunjin doesn’t know. Jisung probably doesn’t know either.

They both lean a little closer to each other.

And that’s when a lightning suddenly strikes the sky in half, followed by a loud thunder that rumbles through the air. Both Hyunjin and Jisung startle, and in a millisecond, the moment is broken. They both turn to look at the sky that’s again being lit by a bright lightning.

“I should probably get going”, Hyunjin then says quietly.

Jisung looks at him with a slightly sad expression, but soon turns it to a small smile instead, “Yeah. I should get going too”

Hyunjin nods and then opens the door, “I’ll see you tomorrow”, he says. He’ll be seeing the younger off at the train station.

Jisung nods smiling, “Goodnight”

“Goodnight”, Hyunjin gives him a small smile and then exits the car, pushing the door closed after himself. He walks across the street in the pouring rain. He doesn’t bother to run, he’s already completely wet anyway. He hears as Jisung turns on the car again and drives off.

Hyunjin fumbles with the key at the door to the building and again at the door to his apartment. When he finally gets inside, he disregards his soaked shoes at the hall and walks straight to the bathroom.

Hyunjin flicks on the light and walks in front of the bathroom mirror.

He stares at himself from the mirror, his mind and heart heavy with ‘ _what ifs_ ’ and ‘ _what could have beens_ ’.

  
~~~~~

  
The next day, as agreed, Hyunjin takes Jisung to the train station. The younger has to first take the train to the closest bigger city with an airport in it, before he can fly to the city where he’ll be moving to. This tiny town obviously doesn’t have an airport, it’s a miracle that it even has a train station.

Jisung has already said goodbyes to his family, so it’s just Hyunjin who’s seeing him off at the train station. The younger has two huge suitcases with him, Hyunjin is currently towing one of them. They’re almost at the right track.

Eventually, they stop at the right track. The train is already waiting there, there’s not many minutes left before the departure. Hyunjin hands the other suitcase to Jisung who sets it and the other one on the ground to wait for a while. Then he turns to Hyunjin again.

“I guess this is it”, he whispers.

“Yeah”, Hyunjin chokes out. The inevitable heartbreak is already throbbing in his heart. Of course, they are going to text and call and take videocalls all the time, but it’s not the same thing as seeing each other in person and spending time together. 

Hyunjin wants to tell Jisung that he’s in love with him, but he feels like it wouldn’t be fair anymore. Not now when the younger is leaving and the confession wouldn’t change anything, only cause more heartbreak than there already is. So, Hyunjin just pulls Jisung to a bone crushing hug and says,

“I’m going to miss you so, so much”

“Right back at you”, Jisung mumbles against Hyunjin’s shoulder. The he pulls away a bit and gives the older a bright smile, despite the fact that there are tears shimmering in his eyes, “But hey, I’ll come visit all the time, you won’t even have the time to miss me”

“No you won’t”, Hyunjin says, he too smiling a little, “You’ll be so busy being a famous artist that you won’t have the time to be visiting this tiny hell hole. I better not see your sorry ass around here unless you’re on a well-deserved holiday”, Hyunjin says, trying to sound strict but with a pretty bad success. 

Jisung laughs and then pulls the older to another hug, “I love you, Hyunjin”, he whispers. 

“I love you too”, Hyunjin whispers back, first tears now falling from his eyes. He quickly dries them with his sleeve and then pulls away from the hug.

“You’ll be huge Jisung, I just know it”, Hyunjin says and smiles, “And remember that I'll always be your biggest fan”

A tear falls down Jisung cheek, but the younger gives Hyunjin a bright smile and nods, “Thank you”, he whispers.

There’s an announcement that the train will be leaving in a few minutes.

“You need to go”, Hyunjin says.

“I need to go”, Jisung admits and takes his suitcases from the ground. He presses the button that opens the train door.

“I’ll see you soon, okay?” Jisung says as he’s stepping onto the train.

“Yeah”, Hyunjin smiles and nods. Jisung boards the train and the doors close after him. Hyunjin takes some steps away from the train so that he can get a proper look through the windows to see inside the train. He watches as Jisung lifts the huge suitcases to where one keeps them during the journey and then sits down on his seat, next to the window. The younger smiles at Hyunjin.

Almost immediately after Jisung has sat down, the train starts moving. Very slowly at first, and then steadily adding some speed.

Hyunjin wants to see Jisung off as long as he can. When the train starts moving, so does he. He walks next to Jisung’s window, and then runs when the train speeds up. 

He runs next to the train, seeing how Jisung simultaneously laughs and cries while watching him. The younger waves his hands as goodbye as long as he can see Hyunjin. 

Eventually, the track ends and the train starts to go too fast. Hyunjin ceases running, stopping at the end of the track and watching as the train and Jisung speed to the horizon. He waves as long as he’s able to see the train, even if he knows Jisung most likely can’t see him anymore.

When the train disappears to the horizon, tears gush out of Hyunjin’s eyes. He feels how his heart breaks into pieces. 

Hyunjin stands there at the end of the track for a long time.

Should it feel this bad and difficult? 

Someone might say Hyunjin is just being dramatic and that first loves rarely last. But Hyunjin doesn’t feel like it. 

He feels like he’s being ripped in half. If soulmates are a real thing, Hyunjin’s one is right now sitting on that train, on his way to the other side of the country, thousands of kilometers away. And maybe soulmates always find their way to each other in the end, but Hyunjin realizes he doesn’t want to have to wait for that.

He finally realizes it’s not worth this heartbreak. Trying to please his parents, inheriting and continuing the family business is not worth giving up Jisung. Hyunjin finally realizes that he, like everybody else, is entitled to build his own happiness, just the way he wants. 

And Hyunjin knows he wants to leave this small town and follow Jisung out to the big, real world. He wants to be with Jisung.

Hyunjin needs to call Jisung and tell him how he feels. Just as he’s starting to pat through his pockets looking for his phone, his phone suddenly starts ringing. He takes the ringing phone from his pocket, checks the caller and then immediately presses to take the call.

“Jisung?” he asks to the phone.

For a moment, the younger doesn’t say anything. Hyunjin waits, and then eventually, Jisung starts speaking,

“ _I wanted to ask you to come with me. I almost did, many times, but I stopped myself because I felt like I wasn’t being fair. But I realized I can’t not do it_ ”, Jisung’s honest, vulnerable voice floats through the speaker,

“ _I know you have your life and plans in our home town, and it’s not fair for me to ask you leave all that behind just for me, but I'm still going to. Hyunjin, I love you. I’m in love with you. And I want you to come where I’m going and build a new life with me. Maybe you can’t or don’t want to but I still have to ask. Like you said, we will regret the things we didn’t do much more than those we did but didn’t succeed in_ ”

Tears are again freely falling down Hyunjin’s cheeks. This time they’re just tears of joy.

“Jisung”, Hyunjin says earnestly, “I want to go with you and build a life with you. I’m in love with you too”

“ _Really?_ ” The older can hear the happiness in Jisung’s voice even through the speaker.

“Yes!” Hyunjin exclaims, laughter almost escaping from his lips because the situation is nearly absurd, “I was just about to call you to tell that I had made a huge mistake letting you leave without me. That I'm in love with you and that I want to come wherever you’re going”

Jisung laughs out of happiness, “ _Is this really for real?_ ” he has to confirm.

“Yes!” Hyunjin doesn’t think he’s ever felt happier, “Just, just give me a little time. I will organize everything here and then I’ll come and find you again”

Jisung is almost out of words, “ _I love you, Hyunjin_ ”

“I love you too. Wait for me, okay?”

“ _Always_ ”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I really hope that you liked it :] ♡♡


End file.
